Don't know what's up with me either. Thought I was doing the right things, throwing the right things at it from my well-worn bag of tricks, but guess not. Another sleepless night. Brooded over everything. I'm like that beastly little dog, digging, digging, digging up dirty trouble, getting nowhere except into trouble.

Next will be sleeping sleeping sleeping sleeping then walking walking walking.

Called pdoc this morn. See him shortly after DAWN tomorrow. He's not in town today. I don't exist at dawn so we'll see whether I can find him, let alone see him.

More drugs no doubt. Hate drugs. Hate depressions. My 1st since bipolar dx 2yrs ago, following 1st psyc hospitalization.

Please take care, Mari. Please be better.