Kitty,
This is going to be a long reading / learning journey for you.
You may want to print some things, and take them to your doctor.
I think I told you what meds I have settled on after 28 years of this, TOS, TBI, blah blah blah...

Learn, then take action!
I've learned, that probably no one, will take action for you, unless you find a VERY KIND ADVOCATE!
But, try everyone, every organization, from the Red Cross on out.

It's No way to live, BUT, You've got to fight those feelings of suicide!
You'll scare any friends you have! And, it won't help. Keep to your prayers!
You need those, more than those Devilish thoughts!

We're All here for you, so keep us up to date, ok?

Pete

asb