Dear Bizi

i can understand your being so anxious about the inservice since it has been so long. however, i think in a week, reviewing your prep material, and perhaps doing a practice run on Jeff or something, or with the mirror if you don't need a person, that will help... like for a speech, you know. i really believe you will be fine when it comes to it and you will come off great. you know what you practice well, because you practice it... so things will roll off your tongue. if you think the anxiety will interfere with performance, maybe take a little klonopin before.

sounds like great insight on the dream. big lizards... reptilian brain, primal instinct, fight-or-flight response. Bizi, you killed your amygdala! But the positive thing about the dream is though, that with all these giant sized fears, and even fleeting ones at the end... you were able to get them under control.

the secret alcohol binge could be part of this phase of heightened stress you are going through. i don't know. try to be self-aware. and keep making sure you take that geodon with food!

i hope you get together with your friend. it will be good for you and that's great that you already have a "test audience" in her!

hang in there sweetie!!!

love you.

~ waves ~