Quote:
Originally Posted by alice md
As you know I chose the name "Alice" because this illness made me feel like I am "Alice in wonderland" and some of those neuros made me think I was in the mad hatter's tea party.
"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
(Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, Chapter 6)
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This has given me many smiles tonight.
I think MG has sent me into my own version of Wonderland. In my long time spent resting I have learned to meditate. I often spend time meditating, focusing on various healing images and it seems to help me, especially since I have major problems with stress.
I recently had a long chat during meditation with a man who considered himself to be in charge of my immune system, I am going to call him my Inner Healer from now on. In my meditation/dream I complained to him about being weak due to MG, and he smiled big like the chesire cat and hugged me, then told me he had done that to me on purpose, that I wasn't sick at all. I think he even laughed. He told me he made me weak to prevent me from killing myself from overworking, that I hadn't been listening to his previous messages and it was the only way to get me to stop. He told me to trust him and that if I would be sure not to overdo it that he would give me permission to work part time (in the meditation dream, he gave me a part time job, lol), and he would reduce the weakness somewhat.
In this meditation session turned dream, I was given back my old job working at a hazardous waste incinerator, and I was told to only do what I felt comfortable doing. The funny part about this job was that I think the incinerator represented my body trying to heal itself, "burning" all the "hazardous waste".
You see, I've spiralled down into Wonderland
, this is only one of my meditation experiences. I've decided to listen to the advice of my Inner Healer, and to consider MG my partner in healing, rather than the enemy I'm used to thinking of MG as.
So, Alice, I'll join you for tea...I think all of us down here in MG Wonderland are much more sane than many of the doctors who try to heal us (I'm joking - your comment made me cheerful, there must be a book somewhere in these MG experiences, a symbolic journey of sorts similar to Alice in Wonderland.).
What you said does make sense...well, in the fact that it doesn't make sense to say MG is not severe just because a person hasn't had a crisis, which is basically what my neuro is saying.