I take ativan as needed for anxiety.

Just a thought... the kind of anxiety you are experiencing seems to be a constant struggle. Perhaps you need an SSRI to maintain some calmness all the time? Ativan is not a good option for constant anxiety because you can get hooked on it.

I currently take effexor (an SSRI) daily to keep my anxiety managed over the long term. My ativan is then used when I have a panic attack (not too often now), to help bring my anxiety back under control.