It is tough to change...but I think you'll be able to enjoy the holiday and family better if you don't strive so much to make the holiday the way it "used to be"...

I have become so hyperaware of how aging takes so much away from what we experience as our lives...we take things so much for granted. My inlaws have become prisoners in their apartment, partially due to choice...makes me aware of how much being chronically ill has changed what I can do during these hectic holidays.

I am a control freak, partially because I used to be so good at all of this type of stuff. I still cook really well, but the cleaning, baking, shopping, etc take so much energy from me that I can't enjoy our get togethers. So I am slowly but surely allowing others to take over. It makes me so sad...but I am trying my best to make lemonade out of lemons...trying not to concentrate on what I can't do, but what I CAN do...