Thank you both very much, I just wanted to say thank you and to let you know I need to think and read about what you both have said. It has really hit me at the core; both what you said Ginnie about it being an abusive situation and mrsD about him being narcissist. I have been looking for a long time to find the right word and that fit so close you couldn't slip a whisper past it. I have a lot of thinking and reading to do, and I do so much appreciate you writing back to me. I was on pins-n-needles waiting for someone to write back. Thank you very, very much.