I am glad you found this site too. also that you discovered this good soul SDfencer. He has been through so much, yet he opens up for council and advise. I have been in contact with him and have the upmost respect for his knowledge and the humanity he shows. He is a "light" to help guide the way for people with your condition.
I am horrified however with how you were treated in the hospital. There is no excuse that I can think of, that would send a patient home, uniformed and terrified to death. This is unexcuseable in my opinion. You needed to be informed of the situation while you were in the hospital, and be seen and evaluated by the neruo surgeon on all facets of your condition. It upset you this way, and your family. I hope that you have the specialist now, and a direction to find the proper solution. That book that SDfencer led you too, is written by one of the best in the country. Even if I had fear, I would read it. It is easier to make an informed decision. Also the doctors won't say anything to you that you will not understand. Learning the medical terms, takes the confusion away. I will be thinking of you cass, and hoping for the best result for you. Please stay with this site, and let me and others know how you are doing. I wish I had that magic wand to make this go away. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and you go forward. I am sending an angel to help guard you. ginnie