1/15/12
Oh fireball, how can this happen? So often I wonder why? how? what in the world (see-stages of grief thanks to glenn - I am still all caught up in these stages!)? You are in a horrid situation and I can really empathize. I am truly sorry about what you are going through. And what you (and Zorro brought up) say about the invisible disability is so true. So many people in my day to day life just don't understand because they can't visually see physical damage. And just trying to explaining to them doesn't work - "Oh, your in pain? Thats to bad. Take some aspirin". I have found that only fellow pn'ers can really understand my symptoms and the impact they have on my life. That is why this thread ended up here. I hope you find support here too.

Sorry about the temper tantrum up there by the way. I know its okay to have one, I just wish I could express myself better. I don’t know the right words to use when I am frustrated and I was so frustrated. I just can’t believe I was out of commission for the whole week! ARRGGGHHHHHH!

Things are a little better around here. The appointment with the therapist went well. She seems ok. We have another app on Monday for a different one. Then we will decide between the two, as I have not heard back from any of the other calls I have made. I would really like to do an intensive workshop but it costs nearly a thousand dollars - I just don’t get it. Why do they charge so much? How many couples can actually afford that? There must be a lot of couples like us who are middle class and it is impossible to come up with an extra thousand dollars! On another note, we are trying to improve our communication. At least I am bringing it up tot him and he says he will do it. I don’t like that though I want him to be more self aware and assertive about fixing our relationship on his own. He has not done a thing. He doesn’t look on line about improvements, he didn’t look for a therapist, he doesn’t tread any books. If I bring up an issue and he happens to agree then he will agree we need to work on it. But that is as far as an effort as he will put. If he would …. I’ve got to stop wishing!

So … Thanks to all and everyone helping me along - I consider this my own personal therapy. It really helps me to just write this down and express myself. And it REALLY helps when other people write in as well - I just love this website - it almost scares me enough to say I don’t want to get over my pn !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!