I handle it one day at a time. A lot of people in chronic pain just aren't the same people we used to be. How we've adapted?... any way we can - whatever it takes. Any/all future plans are tentative. I don't make promises I can't keep, so I don't make promises anymore.

Between chronic pain and all the associate crap that goes along with it, clocks/time don't mean much anymore. I don't think I'll ever reach that grief stage of "acceptance", but I have accepted dealing with erratic scheduling. I didn't sleep last night, so I'll sleep when I'm ready. I try to go to sleep and wake up at regular times, but if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. Some days I make it all the way through; others I'm so hammered I need one, two, three naps, and I still feel hammered, and still need another full night's sleep following (if I can get it). I know that one bad day of flairing can/will take up to three days to get back "on schedule" if that happens. So the only things I push myself to do are the ones that really are imperative - the doctor appointments (a few other things, but not much).

Reading this over, it sounds pretty dismal/gloomy, but to me it's not. I guess that's where my acceptance comes in; this is who I am now, and if not entirely comfortable with it, I've stopped stressing over it, and that's a tremendous burden lifted.

It's my wife who's going through the adjustment now. She's recently retired, and a lot of this didn't affect her because she was gone 9-12 hours a day. The first few times I had an off-schedule day since then, she got really mad because I was up all night and slept most of the next day. Lots of talking and I think she's adapting. Last night I was up again, and my biggest worry wasn't the pain, the anxiety, or the aftermath; it was stressing because I knew she was going to be mad at me again for something I couldn't control. It was different this time; I think we're ok. Having her own medical issues, she's getting it now. If the errands/chores don't get done today, they'll get done when they get done.

Doc