I can relate to the "fake happiness" all too well....I returned to my position as an RN Clinical Nurse Manager 3 months post injury...I fought to act "normal".."happy" and to "pretend" that I was really OK....my family and friends picked up on the changes....

9 months later, I was back out of work and here I am today...doing the best I can with what I can (and I am very stubborn by nature lol)...I try not to get too hard on myself when I suffer setbacks (which I'm dealing with now)...I pray for the good days and enjoy them to to best I can...I go with the bad days as well, but it is really difficult...really, really!!!

I still have my "why me" moments...and I'm OK with it...because it's how I have to deal with this...I am grateful for the day I found this site...just when I thought I was all alone, I found out...I wasn't

I've completely lost my point (which is my norm now)...and I can't find your post (lol)...Everyone here that I have interacted with has been incredible..very friendly, supportive and compassionate...you will find a lot of comfort here...