Did you read my signature? http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
Also stickied at the top of the forum are Pters words..such a wise man. http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread5351.html
He fought depression his whole life and shared what worked for him.

I understand that you want the pain to end...but killing yourself would ruin the lives of the people who love you. Please hang tough and hold on to hope. Things change given time.