That sounds horrible. My best advice is that if there's stuff going on so bad you can't see the positive side of it, it's better to make the decision to feel 'flat' rather than stressed. So you try to detach yourself from your emotions and just not engage with them. It's not very nice, but for me it was better for my brain than the whirlwind of stress chemicals/stimulation when I was stressed out about something.

I'm not saying it's easy or that I would manage it fine in your situation, but it is I think the best thing to try. I would add that losing your job is perhaps a better thing than going on wondering and stressing about whether or not you will lose your job - it closes the situation and gives you a fixed set of circumstances to adjust to while you heal, rather than constant uncertainty and stress that comes with it.

Best wishes