Hello Miles74,..... I am so sorry that life’s Sadness has brought you to this place..but a warm welcome

Talking about fears and feelings is difficult - even to those we know love and care about us. This can often prevent other people from recognising the distress and being able to help in a crisis. Words are often totally inadequate to convey the amount of pain a person may be suffering. It is easy to understand that someone is hurting if they have been badly injured or are physically ill. Emotional pain cannot be seen, but it can be just as unbearable. Sometimes attempting suicide may be the only way to show other people how bad things are.

'When your back is up against the wall, suicide can seem to be the only way out at the moment in time: all rational leaves the mind in my humble opinion.'

What can we do to help?
• Ask them how they were feeling before it happened and how they are feeling now. Talking about suicide does not make it more likely to happen. Try to be patient if they are angry or refuse to talk. If they won't talk to you, maybe they would talk to a friend or relation. It may be that writing things down is an easier way for them to communicate with you.
• b) Listen - this is the most important thing you can do. Treat them with respect, and try not to be judgmental or critical. Is it important to try to raise their self-esteem?
• c) Empathise by showing that you really do care about them, no matter what, and are trying to understand things from their point of view. Words don't always matter. The touch of a hand or a hug can go a long way to show that you care.
• d) Reassure them that desperate feelings are very common and can be overcome. Things can and do change, help can be found and there is hope for the future. People do get better!
• e) Try to give practical support, and help them to cope with any extra pressures. It may not be possible to deal with all the things that are troubling them, but between you agree on what you will do if a suicidal crisis happens again.
•
DONT EVER

Put them down or do things that might make them feel worse. A suicide attempt suggests that self-esteem is already very low.
Abandon or reject them in any way. Your help, support and attention are vital if they are to begin to feel that life is worth living again. Don't relax your attentions just because they seem to be better. It doesn't mean that life is back to normal for them yet. They may be at risk for quite a while.

Nag - although it may be well meant. Nobody wants to be pestered all the time. Don't intrude - try to balance being watchful with a respect for privacy.

Ignore what has happened-

Criticise their actions - however you may be feeling about their suicide attempt, try to remember the pain and turmoil that they were, and may still be, going through. Don't take their behaviour personally - it was not necessarily directed at you.
Let your son know that bullies are not brave but weak.

It’s hard as a child to confront bullies but Adults can insist the school takes swift action, and stress the need for communal highlighting of the sad and tragic events that bullying can lead to.

You sound a great Father, and I’m sure together you can get through this sad event...teenage years are very traumatic anyway, without the anxiety of other external events in life. He just wants reassurance he is safe, loved, and will get through this episode in his life....my best wishes go out to you both