Thank you all for your comments, I am reading the link on grieving , I really need to let myself know that it is ok to cry (even though i feel drained afterwards) I also have been taken by the way it hits me for no reason the last couple days, but I am just going with it. I will wait and decide tomorrow if i need to get back on Celexa for a short time, for now I am doing my best, I cried today and walked in the back yard and let it out, I felt anger (but did not know what for) but allowed myself to feel it, hitting the wall but not hard enough to hurt myself. the one positive is when I use to hold feelings in i would get Panic Attacks and now i am just letting it out and it does feel good, again thanks for the support it means the world to me.