I didn't see your post, or I would have responded right away. I don't know what happened before this current post. I do feel your sorrow over your condition. Mental and physical problems all at the same time can be over powering. In the face of not receiving benefits according to your disability isn't fair eithor. No the system isn't good, and I had my share of problems getting my own benefits, even though like you I had been well documented as having these problems It took four years before I was appoved for anything, and I didn't have health insurance either. I was turned down in the insurance pool altogether when I was young because of a pre-existing condition. In light of that, you must not give up in trying to get benefits. Nobody can do this healing, without the money to do so. I lost all two generations saved for because of the health system. I know full well what it is like to face big medical and mental challenges without money to see it through. Nobody means to upset you here. And I don't want you to leave the site feeling you were not listened to. I am here for you, and I do care. Nobody wants to face these things alone and without support. I wish I had caught your other posts, and that I could have figured out something to help you. I can feel your sorrow zevan, you arn't alone. I do care about what happens to you. Do you have any family support at all? You need to find that way to go forward and get the help you need. There are community based help places in many areas of the country. Start calling around and see if you can find an agency to get you the help you need. Mental help is available but you are going to have to search for it in your city. No it should not be overlooked by anybody. I have mental issues as well. Depression has plagued me for years. I kept coming back here to for help and compassion. I will be here to listen to you at any time. You may PM me if you need to speak privately. don't give up. ginnie