Glad to hear you're feeling a little better. I can imagine how frustrated you must feel.

Sometimes those of us who try the hardest and seem to make good decisions just get eaten alive by life, while others who seem to live recklessly and make poor choices just have things fall into their laps. It's very frustrating and unfair, yet there's not a thing we can do about it, aside from doing our best to control how we react to the situation. This is an almost daily struggle for me--to work on accepting the unfairness of it all. Just as important is finding ways of keeping ourselves going despite all the discouragement and setbacks.

One thing we can do is give ourselves credit for the little things we accomplish. We can set very modest goals for ourselves and maybe each day just try to do one nice thing for someone. It's so important for us to feel like we have control over something, and there are always things we can control, even if it's only how we react to a situation. You can stay strong and virtuous and not let a tragic situation destroy you. You can make your life meaningful by making a difference in your son's life, or your younger siblings' lives, even by doing very small things. You can refuse to be defeated by this condition, even though you are suffering so intensely.

Pete