crystal,

Glad to hear your found someone who can support you in an understanding way.

I have had to deal with this concept of the new me many times over the decades of my condition.

Time, experience, and learning to make sound decisions have helped me immensely. The reality is that I can not undo the damage from my first bad concussion. I can't blame or continue to blame. It is wasted negative mental energy.

With PCS, we can only work on the future. Learning coping skills and work-arounds should be the focus.

Years ago, I was visiting my parents from across the US. My mother commented about how stressed I was when I first arrived and how I was a different person once I had time to settle down. This caused me to think hard about my life and make some changes. It has been a long progression as I have made steps along the way to reduce stress and learn more coping skills.

The most important coping skill I have learned has been to let go of the past. Whether it was a mistake, someone's malicious action, or an accident or whatever, it is the past and it can not be changed. The only thing I can change is MY attitude. My attitude effects MY future and how I impact those around me.

There is an axiom, A fool does not learn from their own mistakes. A smart person does learn from their own mistakes. A wise person learns from OTHERS mistakes.

I try to avoid the first, be consistent with the second and look for opportunities to be the third.

I have also learned that this me has an ability to observe situations and respond to them in a more positive way because of my concussion history.

I count this as an improvement in who I am. I met a 53 yo man last night who has a history similar to mine. He has never met anyone who fully understood his condition as being a part of who he is rather than a temporal how he acts. He went away from our time together with a positive sense of himself.

When we can find room to accept our new self, we make way for a myriad of personal improvements.

My best to you.