All we who are human are destined to err, whether we do so in smothering one with hopes beyond the possible or whether another may, as you wrote, leave a reader feeling as though thoughts were being forced upon them.
As for me, when I had the Trial, and I hope you did get a chance to read of it, my wife asked me as I stopped on the main floor in our great room and asked...... how are you feeling. I was taken aback, because after the first day and a half or so of soreness from the bodily invasion, I had to admit, at that very moment, standing there. I was feeling no pain at all. Now add to this image a well over 250lb guy who at 6'2" have always in my professional career intimidated any foe. Then imagine how the mighty crumble.
I began to shake with sobs of joy, and tears poured out of me as though Moses had only just stricken the rock and water was gushing forth. TEARS OF JOY! Tears of joy........ I knew at that moment God had indeed been at my side and there was relief. Another thing regarding the human body as it changes so many million cells each day, Change will come, and for these past two years of exquisite joy, I would trade nothing in the world. If anyone tried to dissuade me, I would intimidate them into submission. I have known peace again, acquired my practice of my profession in full again, now await news of my admission to practice in New York as well, then Texas to follow. I have much to do, oh, and our family now resides in a home the title of which is in our names again.
I danced with my wife on Valentine's Night. We celebrated. I am no where near the "Fred Astaire" clone I was, but we did get on the dance floor.
Am I a world class athlete? No. Am I able to slalom ski with my children now? No. Am I able to track elk armed with my backpack and .308 with which I can shoot the center out of a dime at 300 yards freehand? No. Some things go away and do not come back for some of us.
Have I earned the income which enabled our family the joy of resuming residence in a home known to us as our home? Yes. Have I turned the heads of advocates who at one time seven years ago feared my very presence? Absolutely, because my mouth and mind work, even if sometimes I must be in a wheelchair because the courthouse halls are far too long. Has my wife seen a rebirth of the person she married almost 39 years ago and spoken up to others how it is as though God remade me for the better? You had better bet your bottom dollar!!!! My blessed love, my joy, has seen me through terrible times, and we have clung to God as we lost our entire fortune to the last dime..... the very last dime. Still clinging fast to God, watch us go in the years to come!!!!!
Yes, by God's grace I am going to purchase Boston Scientific down to its very last secret and meld my newest invention with theirs to create for this globe something which will astound all who see, hear, and feel. There is much work to be done, and this time for the sake of patients, by patients, at the behest of patients, for Wall Street analysts are in my way and had better get the heck out of the road.
So, can this technology help? It has helped me. Does it cure causes of pain? Definitely not. Is it worth the try? Only each patient, one at a time can be the judge. Mine still works well for the pain management as to which it was intended, low lumbar and thighs which used to burn with the very fires of hell while spasming so rapidly as to bring me to tears of agony.
These days I am enduring new pain from nervous system sources beyond the present reach of my SCS, and I have no clue whether my PJ as the group named it [Rae, do you still have my horse?] may be programmed additionally to aid my boiling as if in oil legs below the knees to my feet. Remember, this was that portion of my legs which have been numb since January of 2006, no sensation at all. I have split a toe and never felt it. I know the numbness is yet present, but this other sensation baffles...... and then there is the fact that my right arm is acting as it did before my third surgery to try to repair the nerve. The EMG will let us know whether it is the nerve dying again, and again, and again; however, Kelly please realize my right arm was never the subject of treatment by my successful SCS.
I am a proponent, a success story, an author of an article my Doc is trying to have published internationally. It is pretty hard to squelch the positive spirit which God has formed within me.
I praise God in all things,
May you know peace, healing, respite, joy as I have,
Praying for you,
Mark56
Z, great BIG BEAR HUGS
