Hi all.

Wondering if I have TLE—new to this; been reading Flaherty, LaPlante, Geshwind, etc.

I'm looking for advice on what to/how to say in my upcoming appt. with an internist (not sched. yet and it will be someone unfamiliar to me) as far as symptoms and suggestions. It's my first time bringing any epilepsy-related issues to a Dr. for diagnosis.

I've been treated for depression many, many years, and severe depression for about 8 years now--knocked me out grad school. Haven't worked or done school since; on SSDI. I'm classified as bi-polar II, in which the person doesn't get quite manic, but hypomanic. Some OCD going on.

My background of getting to this point:

I came across hypergraphia this week, knowing that I've been afflicted but without a label or diagnosis or knowledge that it was a recognized disorder/trait. I came upon reading the stuff about Geschwind and his syndrome typography--it describes me to a "T"--and TLE issues. Saw my psychiatrist after this reading and rasied the TLE issue. His major comment was that many of the things I mentioned are commonly present with bio-polar (not usu. with bi-polar II/hypomania to such a major extent as present with me). He said see an internist and then maybe a neuro.

Aside from the personality traits ala Geshwind the things that strike me as potential seizure(s)-related episodes:

Nocturnal-experience of seeming to wake up mentally but not physically; in enormous fear; unable to move; not sure if awake or asleep. Sometimes I wake-up, sometimes not (I think) & recalled in morning. This sounds like sleep paralysis, too. I only think of these as possibly TLE-related from my recent reading.

Frozen moments--Sometimes I have brief moments where I sort of freeze, usu. turning my head slightly to the side, staring, like when trying to recall something. I tune out, come to realize I'm staring off, and then realizing I can't even think of why I would have been trying to recall something. I lose time and I’m just sort of gripped—it’s not volitional. It happens when I'm alone—mostly, or with others but usu. when not in direct engaged action/conversation. It doesn't seem like an extraordinary event to others b/c when prompted by the other I can usually respond fairly quickly, simply, like "give me a minute" or waving my hand, sometimes without even losing the trance state. I know it sounds like Absence seizures. Or is this just the normal pause of trying to recall something? I suffered some significant childhood abuse, and recoverer's use the phrase “going away” to dissociate oneself at times for this sort of thing. I do know it’s been present my whole life and that whatever it is, it is far more common with me than with others. Doesn't seem to happen when I'm driving or otherwise very engaged with others or some activity.

Weird sensations under my scalp --Started when I began Serzone (or at least that's when I first noticed it; if previously it was nowhere near as severe). It's the sensation you can get if you really tense up the muscle in the top part of your head--but far, far more intense. Sometimes only at the temple, sometimes moving backwards. Sometimes a brief one or 2, a bunch in succession, or very rarely one long one. Doesn't happen these days--not on Serzone or similar drug. With having had ECT in Fall 2003, some memories before then are lost like this sort of thing, and I've been on so many diff. meds in last 8 years--35-40+, I can't keep track of occurrences. Having been on and off Serzone, I know the sensations have come and gone in varying intensity—not nec Serzone tie or not. The episodes can be as brief as 2-3 seconds up to about 10-1 if multiple or super-long. Haven't read about this anywhere.

Weird odor smell--The smell is always the same; only at my apt? I don’t assoc. the smell with any specific behavior on my part afterwards, but I don’t know if the odor is real or not. The vast amount of my time is spent alone in my apt.

I know you can't diagnose me from these symptoms, but I'm not sure where to start with an internist who's never seen me before. And, with all of the personal and medical history to cover and the phenomena I’ve noticed, how intelligently to cut to chase so that I can capture his/her attention to take my concerns about TLE seriously. Esp. given that the phenomena can all, individually at least, be attributed to other relatively common (for my other issues going on) disorders or occurrences. I appreciate any comments.

Thanks.

Jack