OK, here's my story...not sure where to go from here...

Have been having sz for over a decade--though they were misdiagnosed repeatedly as "stress". The ones I was having and continue to experience were an odd numb sensation passing over the left side of my body...this was the "completion" of what I now know was a sz, but I had/have other odd sensations that precede or replace the one-side numbness. A new manifestation was a type of "absence" sz, but I don't lose consciousness or cognitive function, just a more general kind of "numbness"--can continue speaking, working, whatever I'm doing. The first time I occurred, I did blank out, but I realized I was simply focussing on the odd sensation that was running over me...

Anyway, April 2005, I had a nocturnal convulsive sz, then another one in November of that year, went to emerg, had the CT etc., finally saw a neuro in January '06. She immediately prescribed Valproic Acid, didn't really seem to be listening to me, didn't explain anything to me...sent me for MRI...

Upon reviewing the potential side effects of the drug, I was reluctant to take it....seems wrong to treat a symptom without knowing the cause when the side effects can be more deleterious to my quality of life than the sz themselves..

Anyway, I have had nocturnal convulsive sz about every 6 months since the first. It's freaking me out, I'm scared, but I did not get a good feeling from the neuro I saw...I know I should try to find a new doc, I just want to be prepared with questions and I want to know how dangerous it is to stay off meds altogether....docs tend to push meds without exploring other options...

I'm babbling, I know..just feeling overwhelmed and lost and scared....