I know I am vulenble at the moment when it comes to men. It seems that I get these crushes on guys so easy. It makes me feel good and livens my spirit up but I don't want the need to feel validated by a man per say. My latest crush has cancer and while I still want to be his friend, I don't want to get hurt. I guess I'm just desperate to have anyone really to be a best friend to and one to me. I don't care if someone has cancer or anything else so don't take me wrong. I just don't want to take the chance of being hurt. I don't mind dreaming and fantazing but but am scared to death on any action because then the hurt would be likely to become worse. I just feel so all alone at times that I can barely stand it and it's the loneliness that spurs all these crushes on, especially on men who are the least bit kind to me. I guess I just needed to talk.

befuddled2