Dear Painman2009,
Sorry you have to go through this mess BUT at least you have a wonderful and compassionate spouse who clearly is an angel sent from God to you. You are very lucky in that matter. All I can say after a little over seven years of dealing with this all and the stupid things people say or do is that you can't waste your precious time on them and their ignorance. You have to use the energy you have on surviving each day and spending time with your wife and your family. The people that support you are the ones that matter...the others...well, they can just go on their merry way and thank God they have not been "blessed" with what we all have to deal with each day.

I have been a single person throughout all of this and have not had an advocate to help me with anything...all while being a very single parent to a teenage young man who has had a very hard time dealing with it all. He (like your wife) gets real annoyed with people that say and do stupid things. He just shrugs it all away and helps me to complete whatever task is at hand. Thankfully after seven years I can say I am about 85% healed (this I say to give you hope). I have tried everything from ketamine to tylenol (and back again). I now only take a half muscle relaxer and 3 mg of Melatonin each night...and most nights will sleep soundly 6-8 hours!!! A true miracle. The only thing that has helped me is natural vitamins/minerals via IV every few weeks, lots of prayer, a great sense of humor, and God. Had I known what I know now I would have NEVER tried the things the "experts" said to try...of which some of them almost killed me. I have found that a very large part of healing is to do inner work. It ususally doesn't happen overnight but unfolds like peeling an onion. Hang in there and do what is best for you and your wife. The heck with the other people because they really don't matter. If I had a dollar for every time someone said something stupid to me or my son we would be millionaires lol. I have tried to educate my family but they still don't get it so I pretty much gave up trying to do so. Yes, at times I still get annoyed that they could be that ignorant but such is life. I try to surround myself with positive supportive people and try to stay away from anyone that is negative. It has helped me to heal. Good luck with your journey and do what is right for you at all times. No one is in your shoes and you have to do whatever you have to do to get through each day.
kathy d