Hi WobblyOne,


I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles!

Since you already have some neurological issues, your situation seems a lot more complex than many of ours who are "just" trying to recover from a single or a few blows to our heads.

I can tell you that people have said to me, I just turned 35 about three weeks ago, that they also have memory issues. Usually people who tell me this are in their 60's. No, it's definitely not the same! But, really, they do NOT understand that their doing this is robbing you of your right to grieve and completely discounting your loss. They really only have the best of intentions and want to make you feel better by telling you that you're still a part of the herd, you're normal and not to worry about the "little" impairments. The reality is that the impairments you are experiencing are quite frustrating and that you perceive a huge loss and difference that you are struggling with. I'm sorry. When this happens, just try to remember that they are doing the best they can. They can't see, know or understand what you're going through, but they still care about you.

I'm lucky that I have a few people in my life that understands what a challenge my own recovery has been for me and how profound the loss feels. One of whom is my therapist. I didn't have a therapist before the accident I was in that caused the injury I'm recovering from - but I can tell you that having one to help me deal with the challenges and changes that I face has been integral with my emotional coping process. Maybe you could consider seeing a therapist too? One who specializes in mTBI, or serious health issues?

As far as the intermittent incontinence is concerned, I had issues with such things for a short while too. Luckily, it went away. Maybe considering wearing something like Depends would be easier and more comfortable than using a catheter?

Since you've been lurking, I'm sure you already know about the healthy way many of us live, by eating well and taking supplements - so I won't say anything about that. But let us know if you want some advice in that area and many of us (I'm sure) will offer up our opinions on the matter.

When you talk about trying to remember the screwdriver you need and then forget - something that has helped me in similar situations is that I start saying to myself, either in my head, or with a whisper or low volume speech, what it is I need until I reach the area that the thing is located in. ie: "screwdriver, screwdriver, screwdriver, etc" until I reach the toolbox. Once I reach the toolbox, I'll think, gosh what am I here for? But I just said "screwdriver" to myself seconds before so it's easier for me to remember. I use this trick at home and at work and it's helped me a great deal.

I also think I should be carrying around a small pad of paper to help myself, but I haven't started doing that yet. They sell little pads, that are pocket-sized with a pen or small pencil included, like this: http://www.amazon.com/Blank-Aluminum...196529&sr=8-13
These small aluminum cases are usually sold in drug stores and the pens and pads are refillable.

Or, maybe a smart phone can help you in this instance?
I keep lots of "notes" written in my smart phone on its "notepad" to help me remember what kinds of things I need to buy at the store. But someone could easily have a page dedicated to short term memory.

Lastly, I should mention that memory is an interesting thing in terms of the brain. My mother is recovering from encephalitis. She has retrograde and anterograde memory problems. She is literally unable to record new memories at all. When she was first released from the hospital, she could not remember from one minute to the next. It's been more than 2.5 years and now she can remember for upwards of 2 hours on "good days". Her neurologist believes that within another year or two, she will be almost back to normal.

The hippocampus has a lot to do with memory - it's the only part of the brain that produces new neurons. There might be a lot of hope to be had in the area of memory recovery. I've done a lot of research about memory recovery, because of my mom, and I did it before sustaining a brain injury myself... and from what I've read, no amount of therapy can help improve a person's memory.

But my own memory has improved a great deal in the last 22 months when it was damaged in an auto accident. It's spontaneously gotten better and I expect it to continue to do so. But, I don't think there's any real way to know one way or the other whether a person's memory will improve after any brain trauma or neurological issue, especially when considering that the natural aging process is probably not helping the situation.

I hate to tell people to "be patient" because I hate it when people say that to me. But, perhaps, whether you can be patient or not, some of the impairments you have to deal with now will get better over time. Until then, may your path be as smooth as possible.