I'm sorry to hear about your loss. It's tough not having anyone around but I am so uplifted and grateful for you all responding. Even if its just black letters on a white screen - It's something.

I hope you can make it through with support from your family.

I felt a bit better the day after my break down the other night but It seems I have picked up a stomach bug - I woke up vomiting this morning - I'm having other GI issues so I happy to say I think its something I ate - not my head. I was a little bit nervous about at first but it makes more sense that I got a stomach bug.

I wish I could get answers and give answers to everyone - It's very scary and difficult not knowing when or if I will ever get better - I hear of people pulling through at 6 month - 8 months etc and I wonder what that feels like.

It's like when you have a flu, you feel so crappy its hard to remember what normal was. I feel like I don't have a very bad case in that I am basically headache free but 4 months in and here I am still. I suppose its hard to gauge.

I watch "sad" movies. They have always made me feel better, It's not an approach for everyone I guess - but I find them closer to reality, they usually make me rethink what's really valuable in life.

I just watched Things We Lost in The Fire

It was very moving. Perhaps not for everyone but it reminded me of this forum and all the strangers here who band together. A little bit of love goes a long way.

As always - Thanks - I'm having a tough time holding on and this is my only sanctum.