Thanks for your reply. I have a therapist I am seeing twice a week right now, and she's great. I am just on here to receive additional support. I've talked to her about all this, and she and I are working through it together.
I am depressed, and I am seeing a psychaiatrist for meds, and we are working on seeing what's right for me.
I have a team in place, not to worry.
The trigger last night, I have found was just that, a trigger. And my sisters' experience was not my own. Hard realization to come to, but this morning I have accepted that I have to work on myself right now.

~S