Starr,

My years of practice started with years of failure.

When I had my first NeuroPsych Assessment, the report mentioned that I am prone to outbursts. He did not know about my history of outbursts. It was the start of me recognizing that my behavior was not justified but rather a behavioral problem.

Previously, I had claimed a right to be angry. Now, I knew it is was a symptom of my injury. It was a wake up call. I needed to start working on it.

As I did, my wife told me how it scared my kids. This was more incentive to change. Before, they were afraid to comment about my behavior.

I have not kicked a box in years but still struggle with shouting matches. I have a neighbor who tends to become condescending and aggressive with his comments. He's an ex-Marine and a cop, too. He can set me off. He is just as abusive to his kids. I see their reaction and after learning how I used to scare my kids, I tend to be confrontational with him when he verbally abuses his kids. Not a pretty sight. I have had to learn to walk away.

So, it is the school of hard knocks.

The most important part of improving is to first realize how reacting and getting angry will rarely cause even a little change. Then, the goal is to stop or prevent the reaction rather than try to control it.

Try to remember the saying, "Don't even go there."

It's a struggle but worth the effort.

It is a part of PCS that few ever heal from so learning to change is the only way to improve.

As I have said before, I have had very little healing in the past 12 years. Most of my improvement has been in learning to function despite my limitations.

My best to you.