Hi, I can't help you, as I am still trying to help myself, but I feel your pain and I said a prayer for you after I read your post.

When you said:
"After being dropped by two pain dr's who wanted a "good" patient who doesn't Google, ask questions, give input or cause them to work very hard"

I could very much relate to you. A couple years ago my Blood Pressure soared and my dr asked me to leave his practice for the same reasons you stated, I was trying to be my own dr. I felt hurt and abandoned. I thought, how awful was I that a dr actually asked me to leave??? Just because I refused to go on the specific med he wanted me on????

I didn't realize how deeply that dr hurt me and made me feel wrong...until now 2 yrs later I am dealing with some kind of neuropothy in my feet that 2 drs say is from my thyroid even though they tested my fasting diabetic glucose they say i dont have it but I think I do.

Anyway, I say all of that to encourage you to keep on being in control of your health. I fired the first dr I went to and took control of my own health. I found a dr that was willing to give me the desicated thyroid hormone I wanted. And I have learned that no dr will ever care about me as much as ME. So if I have to fire another dr and move on then I will.

So don't let any dr make you feel less for taking charge of your own health. Keep fighting the good fight to find a dr JUST TO FIT YOUR NEEDS. I am learning to trust myself more and to fight for myself.

I wish I had other words to help you but its a journey I am on also. But I do believe my God is able to heal me..with or without dr's, and if I am not healed instantly then He will guide me down the path to finding healing with a dr's help.

Don't give up!