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Originally Posted by AlexNew
Hey everyone,
Quick history, I've posted before. I got PCS after hitting the back of my head in the shower in December '11. I struggled with anxiety, feeling cloudy, sluggishness, and occasional insomnia for about 9 months. But after that it seemed my PCS had completely cleared up. I had the occasional anxiety or days feeling cloudy, but nothing near what I used to feel.
About a month ago, in the beginning of July, I started feeling very down and sleepy some days. I wouldn't want to do anything and would be kind of negative. This is very unlike me so it worried me a bit, but I shook it off. It wasn't too bad until one day I was extremely stressed and upset the entire day about nothing in particular.
After that day, I felt better and just attributed it to maybe not getting enough sleep or being a bit stressed.
But for about the past two weeks, I have felt very mildly depressed almost every day. Some days I feel better, but it'll return a little bit at night. I'm not sure if this is my PCS returning in a way because I didn't hit my head or twist my neck or anything extreme. And I never experienced depression like this during my original wave of symptoms. I definitely don't feel myself.
I have to admit, it is the summertime and I have not been eating great or exercising regularly like I'm used to. Also, I just turned 20 so I've been reflecting on my life a lot. This made me kind of loathe the minimum wage summer job I've worked since I was a young teen and feel like I've been just "wasting my time" all summer. I feel this definitely might be contributing to it.
Could this depression be my PCS returning? Or is this depression starting on it's own? I've never been a gloomy person by nature, and am usually upbeat, happy, cheerful, and optimistic even during hard times.
Does anyone have any advice? Thanks!
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From experience, Depression I believe, is when life passes you by and you do not process it properly. This leads to an overload of unanswered questions and frustrated emotions.
Maybe if you sit down with a good friend or councillor and gradually go through the year gone by, with all it's ups and downs. The extremes of emotion, pain or anxiety that you may have coped with but not reacted to, you will probably realise exactly what has brought on your latest bout of depression.
Depression can and does resurface when our life returns to "normal" because we stop processing. So for ex. today, what did you do, where did you go, who with, how did it make you feel?
When we feel a certain way about a person or circumstance it's because we connect it to something that touches us from the past.
For example, if a workmates partner was sick but you did not know them personally, you may still sympathise with the person on an emotional scale if you too had suffered the same illness in the past.
We relate in this way to our daily life experiences. This is why something we see on tv may make us cry unexpectedly.
I dont want to overwhelm you, but for now practice each day by summarising it, maybe write it down or tell someone about it.
Don't let each day just go on by without slightly analising it. this will help you to liturally keep on top of yr emotions.