Hi Jodi,
Welcome to NT. I'm sorry that you have to be here. It can be very scary in the beginning. I'm so glad that you lucked out and got an appt. at the MS clinic. Because it is so overwhelming in the beginning people usually have a lot of fear and anxiety. I was deathly afraid of ending up in a wheelchair. Just remember that everyone's course of the disease and experience is completely unique. 5 years later I have not had a relapse and am still just as mobile. That may change but i don't see any evidence of it yet.
Since my diagnosis came out of the blue with no warning I had a lot of anxiety about every little thing in my body. You become hyper conscious of your body. It turns out that many of the "symptoms" I was having that I was convinced were MS turned out to be anxiety attacks-such as tingling in my hands, feet, face; dizziness; nausea; headache. You can literally will yourself into having physical manifestations of anxiety.
Grieving and crying is also normal because of what you feel you have lost (your old healthy self). I tried to educate myself but not read obsessively on the topic because it could trigger panic attacks. I found a book by Margaret Blackstone to be very helpful and soothing.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/156924...6477843&sr=8-4
I read it over and over again until the book got stained and wrinkly! It offered the perfect amount of information and was a little bit more on the hopeful side which is what I needed in the beginning.
You will find this forum to be very supportive. Don't be afraid to post your concerns, questions etc.
Take care,
Natalie
PS: not sure why there is a winking face at the top! Also read the book above before you tell your boss. I would recommend on holding off until you know more about the disease and can really take stock of where you work and how people will respond.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jodi2225
I really want thank all of you for the responses, I literally have tears. I never knew anything about MS and when people spoke about it, I just thought "oh yeah, that disease that puts people in wheel chairs" and I feel so ignorant that I've always had the "will never happen to me" attitude. This has opened my eyes to reality, and for that - I am extremly thankful.
The neuro called today, stated I have MS and cant make an appt for 2 weeks to go in an see him to discuss treatments but he asked if I could go to the hospital today to start steroid treatments for 3 days. I asked to start is next week because I dont know what benefit that will bring me or any knowledge of the side effects so wanted more time to digest. In the meantime I called an MS center in Boston (where I live) who schedules 6 weeks out but I actually got an appt for this Friday due to a last minute cancellation right before I called, so I am looking forward to that and busy writing down questions.
Funny thing is is that today I felt very dizzy, nauseaus and off balance a bit. Im sceptical to think that this is all of a sudden and too cooincidental to happen on the day of my diagnosis, so im really confused because I dont know if Ive felt like this for a while and ignored it and passed it off as something else or if it really did just start today - either way its real and im very scared now. Thanks guys for letting me vent and talk about my experience. Trying to find the courage now to tell my boss. Thank you very much again.  |