About six months ago I started having what I refered to up until last Wednesday as "episodes". I would be driving, or sitting at work and be overcome with the most odd feelings of weirdness. Of course, googling "I feel weird sometimes" lead me to believe I was bipolar, had heart disease, or was drinking too much coffee! I honestly thought that since these episodes sometimes corresponded with low carbohydrate intake I was just experiencing ketogensis!

Then last wednesday morning I had that same weird feeling, I got it a lot in the morning but this was unlike any other time, it was so intense I had to brace myself on the bathroom counter. Then I got tunnel vision, and then I woke up on the floor.

I slipped! So tired I fell asleep standing up! But why does my tongue hurt? Must have bit it on the way down, how silly of me.

I continued getting ready for work, got in my car, started driving. Got about half way to work, when I got the sudden realization. Something is not right about this.

Needless to say after spending all day in the local ER and being referred to a neurologist which i saw the next day:

Part of my brain is underdeveloped! And everyone is surprised I'm not an idiot!
Part of my brain is covered in scar tissue!
My "episodes" were simple partial seizures!
What I experienced on Wednesday was something with second generalization!
I can't drive for 6 months!
I am on some pretty hefty medication (generic dilantin 300mg/day for the next week and generic topamax 50mg/day) and I feel like a zombie (and I'm not even up to full dosage on the topamax!). How am I supposed to work like this? I am a knowledge worker. Thursday and Friday weren't great and now that I've had a few days to take this stuff I feel really spacey.

My neurologist seems like a genuinely kind person who wants to help but is obviously overworked. The only reason I saw her the day after was because shes associated with the hospital who's ER I went to and obligated to see ER patients, otherwise it was a three month wait. I got an hours notice of the appointment. I waited almost 45 minutes after the appointment was scheduled to see her and she had to leave in the middle for 5 minutes because she was the on call neurologist at the time.

Anyway, that's the whole tamale. Actually, my coworker went though something similar six or seven years ago and so understood a lot of what I was going though (and even suggested I see his neurologist, although how I do that I don't know) but I guess I am feeling really alone right now.