Thanks all - Start steroid infusions tomorrow, wish me luck! Im not doing too well emotionally lately - I feel as if Im crying, angry, mad, confused and going through this craze of emotions but yet physically feel fine - I just have a little numbness in my hands...I look back and read my posts and then think to myself "Was that really me that typed that?? Is this all really happening to me??" - Its tough. I put on a very strong front to family/friends and will just cry in the car by myself for now. I really just wish they would stop denying me a spinal tap - I think that will help me accept it more. I look up to every single one of you on here and am now addicted to this site, its like my own little world of friends who "get it"- thank you all again.