I don't know much about other peoples families who have a member with PD, only my own. I've brought this up before on the "old board" but would like to rehash it because i'm having increasing problems as my family grows older and need the input and advice from others.
My problems all started when a young child would get "uppity" with me; "in my face" so to speak, ya know what I mean? It could be anything really, but just a feeling of loudness, screaming, and not in a playful manner. It used to make me skake terribly and get me really upset, so much so that I would vociferate back (give 'em $hit ). They were actually quite innocent and after a few years wore on, realized that dad could be a bear, if you messed with him. This brought nothing but anguish, for all involved, but we adapted, and for the most part were like nearly any other family.
As I have just past the decade mark in my PD sojourn things are getting increasingly tense if, after a few weeks, someone forgets the "leave dad alone or he'll get in one of his moods rule" . The real trouble is that my falling down is increasing in frequency and the strangest thing is, I could be standing comfortably, or especially walking (with or without cane), And as long as I'm undisturbed, I won't (usually) have any reason to initiate a fall. However something has changed and it's very disturbing. I could be, say, walking along and the mere eye contact with someone else talking loud "at me" will instantaneously make me slump into a fall. The severity of the fall is proportional to the "emotional index" (as I call it) of the "get my attention " event.
Today my daughter drove me to the liquor store and I bought some beer and a bottle of rum . Now the wife has put it in my 11 year old's head that I'm not supposed to drink any alcohol (which in moderation, I have found does absolutely NOT affect my tendancy to fall, although one would think ,naturally, that it would indeed, but it doesn't). I can see my wife's point of view, but alcohol (once again in moderation) helps to soothe the pain of PD, and makes an "on" even more pleasurable, since being on is the high (couldn't resist that one!) part of any day, and on periods are getting shorter and shorter. At any rate, he came barrelling towards me, screaming "dad why did you get booze, you know you're not suppossed to drink alcohol ! Well, my body went limp at this sudden, unexpected barrage and I fell, smashing some bottles, and giving ol'cs another "kill" mark on my left knee. Needless to say, I was angry and completely flustered, but didn't say much as I have learned that any reaction on my part always makes matters worse. Now this is not restricted to the bit that I have shared with you guys. Just about any fast, loud movement towards me for any reason makes me just turn into jelly and fall down. For instance, a ball thrown at me unexpectedly or someone coming unnoticed from behind a door in a confined space, things of that nature. AS long as i'm emotional neutral, I can still walk a short way without falling, but distract me in anything else but a very slow and subdued manner and it's like my brain just "shuts off" momentarily and I just fall down. It's not like passing out, it's a very short period of loss of any ability to keep muscle tonus.
Anybody else experience this? It is a new and very disconcerting symptom of PD, that I haven't found much info about .
Since each fall sets my walking ability back further and further, I am so worried that i'm soon to be in a wheelchair, not to mention the emotional turmoil that I am wreaking on my poor families' emotions, when I sometimes insinuate to them that their actions are the result of my reaction. . cs