My Dr. has not told me that I will be unable to communicat, but has told me more than once when I have balked at increasing drug dosages, or wanted to stop taking them, that in all liklihood, I will be on the medications for the rest of my life. I seem to be growing into the migraines rather than growning out of them, and the secondary problems stemming from the drugs and pain are beginning to add up.

My fears of not being able to communicate come from the fact that at present, during bad breakthroughs, I can't talk. My friend has gone through this with me for so long that she understands through body language, what is going on. As is the case in many older folks, there can be things like alzheimers and other dementias that may appear similar to the rocking, head pressing/banging and a severe breakthrough could easily be misinterpreted. Good nursing homes with observant, compassionate staff cost a lot of money. Money that I don't have. I've been in state run homes in the past, and the staff is often burned out, way overworked with an impossible case load. I'd rather perish at home by way of dehydration or starvation than go to one of those.

Music, although I love it, is a bad thing for me. Not something I want to go into here. I used to love to read. In the past six years its become painful. I save my reading for keeping up on my veterinary information and this forum.
I used to be able to get a great deal of peace from walking long distances in quiet parks. Something else that is now gone. I haven't given up looking for things to replace those things, it just gets frustrating sometimes.

Sam