This past weekend, I went to see a client that has become a good friend. Cliff is in his 70's and is going blind due to macular degeneration. We became friends after I helped him with one of his designing projects.

The past two months have been kind of rough. I have been working my butt off, not spending enough time with Mrs. Moi, different family members have had their crisis and seemed to be leaning on us, and neither of us have been getting any sleep...my biggest guilt was toward Mrs. Moi, who is so very patient, so very understanding to...well...MOI...and I thank my lucky stars that she is in my life...unfortunately...I am also a man...a stubborn man...and my anger has eaten me...

So, after we worked on the current project, Cliff took me out to lunch. It was a warm and sunny day here in the low country. We went to "Jim and Nicks BBQ" (in case you are reading from Alabama) and ordered a big platter of onion rings, pulled beef briskets, and blackened Cat Fish. Cliff's best friend, Jack, joined us and the three of us had a grand ole time...

(now, I must say that I was really impressed with their onion rings...huge sweet rings lightly battered and was crisp yet not greasy. The aroma was heavenly and the flavor was scrumptuous. But enough about the onions!! Or we'll have to talk about gas emissions!)

my well being became the subject eventually for they can see that I was stressed. So I started talking about my "Anger" as of late...

I was born angry, I think, and I have stayed angry. Although I have tried to keep it under control, to be positive and relax. But with all the stress lately, I felt it creeping its way back and I felt like I was going to explode...

When I took them home, a girl (she looked young) sped up right behind me. I was already going 10 miles over the speeding limit yet I saw her flashing her head lights at me and gesturing for me to move over.

What really got my goat, or cat, or cow, was that I saw her "look." It was one that is filled with the "why don't you pull over, you old fart. I can take you all on cause I think I am young and pretty" look.

There was no car to my right side and our turn was coming up. She could've very welled get to the other lane and just passed me...but nooooo...she had to act like an (___!___)...so, I pulled to the right side anyway and I mouthed off to her and gave her the "Death Glare"

She looked at me and actually looked scared...Hmmmmm...didn't know I was that ugly....

at that point, I was conflicted...I know that I did the right thing for NOT putting up with it. At the same time, I felt bad that I was not nice...I also felt bad that I couldn't just let it go. Because in hind sight, what would've the death glare accomplished besides given me cocked eyes??

Jack and Cliff saw how upset I was and understood yet advised me to calm down, told me to "fohgeddebouit" ( I swear Cliff looks like Tony Soprano bald, or Telly Savally with an awful mob accent)...I took them home, thanked them for lunch, and decided to head to Savannah, Ga...

Savannah Georgia, one of my favorite cities in the world. The drive to the city will take me through a wonderful canopy of live oak trees with their branches interwoven letting slight sunlight through while I enjoy the greenery in my field of view...

wait, what happened?? Oh NO!!! A I saw back-hoes, I saw dump trucks, I saw constructions...YIKES!!! The route that I loved to take has now been modified...trees were cut down to make way for the "developments"

Grounds were dug up to make Man Made Ponds to make it "water view" (water view seems to jack up the price about 400% around here). My heart sank...my anger rose...my favorite drive...RUINED...by these developers...

more condos, more million dollar homes in these ritzy neighborhoods...at the cost of the sceneries...these ancient live oaks...that have lived hundreds, if not thousands of years...their comrades fallen...fallen...fallen...to be turned into firewoods, framing lumbers, furnitures, mulches, for these million dollar developments...

then a driver tried to pass me and two cars infront of me while there were traffics speeding from the coming lane...DEATH GLARE TO HIM? YOU BET!!

Then, I missed my turns and exits as I was in Savannah and ended up getting lost for about 45 minutes before my stubborness relent and I finally pulled over to ask for directions...my anger now is at myself for being a man...a man that is too stubborn to stop and ask for directions...

I now had forgotten why I was in Savannah...my mind is simply filled with anger and I wanted someone to come and push me, to come talk junk to me, to pick on me(people often do cause of my tics) so I can have a reason to just let them have it...

then, I thought about that Va Tech Shooting...and I said to myself, wow, insight, moi, insight...that guy lost it completely. I cannot ever allow myself to do that...EVER...yes, I felt sorry for the dude, but there was NO excuse for what he did...he had plenty of chances and people reaching out to him even though he was picked on. But still, the anger lingers and I run into more jerks...

But I chose to smile back...and I did...

Luckily for me, there was a piano recital right in the middle of the mall that I decided to pull into to get a quick bite to eat...I ended up staying watching the young students playing their hearts out and clapped my hands off. I also fell asleep for a little bit and woke up to my own drool...

that made me smile...

It is time for me to leave...it was about 6:30pm and I needed to get back home that is over an hour away...

The bridge that takes me out of Savannah to home is about 10 stories high. It is a magnificent bridge. So grand, so peaceful...




vrrrrroooommmmm...ZOOOOM...an idiot passed me going at least 80mph on the bridge going down a steep slope...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...

but wait...as I started my own descend...I rolled down my windows...the breeze from the river was nice, crisp, and warm. It enveloped me and caressed me...the "marsh" smell was pleasant and welcomed...the sun was behind me and it energized me with its warmth and made me so comfortable...

I, "SMILED"

I started to realize how small I was compared to this bridge...then I saw the sceneries around me...it reminded me of "Gone With The Wind" where the earth was glistened with sunset, the fields were golden green and the water reflected all with its own renditions...

I took it all in, smiling even more, my heart skipped in rhythm with the nature...I stuck my hand out the window, helping to guide the breeze to my face. I realized how smaller I am even more, compared to this planet that I live in that gave me "LIFE"

my anger dissipated..."fooom!" just like that, it was gone...

I let out a loud scream...a HAPPY one...one that I haven't felt in a long time...I waved at the on coming cars, in all sincerety for them to reach their destinations safely...I was sincere in my shouts, in my warmth, in my humbleness...

a pale dot, is all I am on this earth...then, how can my anger be more than that dot??

I am nothing...anger is nothing...going...going....gone...

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