This thread reminds me of our recent losses too.

Since Oct 2010 we have lost 4 kitties. Sheba (24) who was very very old, and Tippy, who was not quite as old, but 20, recently Oreo (14) with her year long cancer struggle, and little Houdini (8mos) who disappeared one night with no warning--and not knowing what happened eats at me still.

Each has been extremely painful, but each in its own way.
The grief with Houdini is the worst for me. The others had long happy lives, and I have wonderful photos of them to remind me.
So the sadness I feel for them is very different from the recent loss of Houdini.
Houdini, left me with GUILT...that I it was my fault somehow.

I think that people who connect well with pets, share a bond with them, that is very difficult to break. As a result of all this, I have become overprotective of our new kitties. And I spoil them terribly. I won't let Maya out at all. And Weezie is only going out in daytime, for short periods, and she is slowly accepting an indoor life now. I do let them on the screened in porch however. Eventually they will both be all indoor, I hope.
Maya however, is quite a character, and I don't know what the future will hold for her. She may become difficult to restrain indoors 100%. She comes from barn cat background and displays alot of hunter behaviors. I just don't know what will develop next year.

We can only do our best for our furry friends. Love them, give them food, acceptance and respect. And there are so many out there suffering right now needing a home, as well. I can tear up now almost from nothing, and I was never like that before.