You stated you were looking for something stronger for the pain. And also you go to the ER weekly? Using the emergency room to obtain prescriptions is something the doctors office could possibly see with drug monitoring, and it may raise flags. They can run your name and see every ER visit and narcotic prescriptions issued to you. That is just some food for thought if the doctor is reluctant to write for you.
Also, neurontin is a good med and costs much less than lyrica.

I can't say much as far as the significant other goes. Try bringing him to an apt so he can hear what the doc says. Or show him some literature on your condition, there is plenty out there.