Dear Butterfly,
You mentioned you don't know anyone on the Survivor's of Suicide Forum. Several of us cross-post there at times - myself, Steve, BlueMajo, for instance. I know several others also... In general, the group is one of very gentle and sensitive folk. Alffe is the group leader and no doubt will reach out to you.
I hope it is ok that i took the liberty to post a thread there, introducing you. i quoted some of your posts regarding your loss and recent difficulties you've experienced.
If you don't feel ready to participate, you might find it helpful just to read some of the sticky threads at the top.
Thoughts from Pter on Suicide has wonderful insights.
Finally if you are uncomfortable with my introduction post or thread,
do not hesitate to let me know, we can remove any or all of it, as you wish.
here is the specific link to the thread:
New member Butterfly could use your support
here is the general forum link:
Survivors of Suicide


~ waves ~