I could hardly believe it when I read about you son, the ADHD, and the ritalin.

So was my son. When he was about 6 or 7, we had him evaluated (no one even mentioned the words Aspergers back then). All they said was ADHD, put him on Ritalin, put him in Special Ed..... So we did. In 6 months, they said "no, he doesn't have ADHD, take him off the ritalin, he doesn't need it, he has Oppositional Defiance Disorder. (With all the accompanying rages, meltdowns) Ultimately when he was 10 or so, he decided to "get out of Special Ed". I had nothing to do with it. He said "I can control my behavior" and control it he did.

Unfortunately, when he became an adult, after graduating college (full scholarship), he just left home and that was 5 years ago. He became a compulsive gambler and is now on SSI.

How different our sons turned out. You are indeed blessed.

This thing with our son, well it kind of destroyed our mental health, and our physical health. It affects the family. It really does. No other way to say it. And I won't bring it up again. It just does something to a mother's heart.

I have had to make a lot of adjustments in my life. Perhaps that's why I turned to food the way I did. Thankfully, that is all behind me. I no longer self medicate with food. But the consequences of that behavior, well, I have diabetes, and now diabetic neuropathy. I just have to deal with this too!!!

It would have been nice to have a son to come for dinner on Sunday, with children, to have a house full of kids running around, calling me Grandma.
But with his having aspergers and not evening calling us to inquire about us. (its been a long long time since we've even heard from him), well, it does break one's heart. Never thought this would happen. I only wish we could have known about the aspergers (or one of his therapists, when he was younger, maybe if one of them had said "your son has aspergers disorder, well you know me, I would have been all over it, getting information, etc.".

We didn't catch a break in that department. The stress would definitely have killed another person. How Alan and I have survived the past 5 years, well I don't know. But we have and we will continue to do so.

All I want to do is deal with MY neuropathy right now.

So I wish you and your darling son all the best. And he cooks too!!!! Oh how devine is that!!!! Alan wouldn't know his way in the refrigerator. He can't even turn on the stove. I tried years ago to teach him to cook something in the kitchen. I would say "what if something happens to me, what will you eat??" Alan's reply, "Cereal, or I'll go around the corner and ordered steamed chicken from the chinese takeout".

See, these men survive, now don't they???

lol
Melody