Dear God
dear friends

thank you for another day

today and for the last two days
the weather is not been helpful
as the body cries in pain
my doctor has decided to keep
me on the same amount i have
been on
i will see him again the end of
the month
the worse time is morning
and although i no i need more to relieve
the pain i have a personal stigma that is on my
back reminding me of sobriety
as it is something i must take
as i will not have any surgery of
any kind
oh i'm sorry
lets see what happens to
the left side of my
chest as it slowly migrates downward
pictures taken as time goes by
WILL BE THE LAST OF SURGERY
TO REMOVE THEM AND CLEAN
CUTS WOULD BE APPRECIATED
anyhow
when the pain is in the center of
my chest the pain in neck shoulder
arm back site of surgery base of
my skull then eventually my head
tooooooo heavy anybody else feel
what i dooooo
i opt not to get the suggested
SCS or pain pump for that matter
this is a personal decision
just to thing of all the test i
had and what else my body was
subjected too
on a radiation level
eeeeeeenuf
just do what is mandatory
on a yearly basis
preventative care
wish many others would practice
it
if given sick days like my place
of employment
and with the flu A TYPE
my job you are rewarded not taking
a certain amount of days
no no no no no
you take them because you are sick
stay home home not parting
this a place of not knowing
their priorities
that was just an example
i think you all get the picture

i have many blessings in my life
of who suffer dearly in one form or
another

i love being a mother
and just as much a grandmother

my son came and visited
looking 100% better
smelling great he is
so tall and so thin
told me he got his meds
doctor prescribed
for personality
any how it was so good to
see him just stopped by
just because it felt good
he had a blast with his niece

we may get one more night with Eva
weather related
the fearful thing about
this is her responsibility
are up held she must be
back at facility by 8:00 P.M.
Monday Eva is here as of Friday
evening it is when Christine stays
overnight as the other grandmothers
house as the father still lives with mom
i no
i hope a smart girl is on
her best thinking
not to practice unprotected
activity for Eva and her sake
this i pray for
i pray that she get stable
housing and a way to begin
a life routine with her daughter

buuuut we might be rewarded
and we get sleep over again
few prayers for that please
wouldn't hurt
she looooves being here
soooooooo much room to run
i let her go for it
just watching

IS MY BLESSING
WATCHING HER INTERACT
WITH UNCLE AND AUNT
WAS FUN

TODAY I STAY IN BED
MY MEDS KICKED IN BUT
MY ARM NECK BACK
ALL WEATHER AND MECHANICAL
SCREW UP PERMANENT NERVE DAMAGE

thems the break

to all
a blessed God filled day
as thy will be done
give us this day our daily bread

thank you for letting me share
that someone who cares