It is a whole new lifestyle. I know how difficult it was for me early on. I went through a great detail of emotions. I was very active as well, and worked as a police officer and on a SWAT team. I am 16 months since my first surgery and I am currently on disability. I have had to take a new look at my life. Early on it was very difficult, but I can tell you that I have turned the page and I am enjoying life again. Yes I can not do some of the things that I use to love, but I am happy again and enjoying the smaller things in life. I do keep some things around for inspiration, like I look at my golf clubs everyday and tell them someday I will use them again. I have gone to a course with some friends and played in a scramble, where I just putted, but at least I was out there and in good company. Your true friends will completely understand and support you.