View Single Post
Old 01-24-2013, 09:11 PM
ger715 ger715 is offline
Magnate
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,180
10 yr Member
ger715 ger715 is offline
Magnate
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,180
10 yr Member
Heart

Quote:
Originally Posted by Burntmarshmallow View Post
i guess I am thinking way to much . I DID stop her ...two different times I called her and she was like how did you know to call and i was like its not time you have to make sure you have taken care of things and she held off both time. i mean she was in the first step and i got her to stop. but this last time when she sent the sign it was time ...I said i loved her more then she can ever know I shut up and let her go about her plan . and when i look from another point of view the crying and stuff at her service and crying now and the missing I suppose either way its a lose lose situation and in the long run her family would of been crying and missing her each day she slipped deeper into alzheimer's and i too right along side them . she did spare us and broken hearts would be broken whether she did or didnt end her life. maybe her way was easier. I get "signs" from her allot. her spirit and i know she is in a better place and she is a big spirit an angel free from earthly skins. I am good on that. it is those left behind.. and you know spot on what i mean when i say those left behind. I want to take their sadness away I want my sadness and unworthiness to go away. I told her about Nikki and ALL the issues Nikki has . and she told me ha ya know she told me Nikki needs a friend like you everyone needs a friend like you teenie beanie . but I dont feel it. I I just want my best friend back healthy and illness free. I am SO CONFUSED . and someday soon i know they will both meet in the great beyond .I am scared to tell nikki what I want to say . but I will cus I am a warrior and warriors do things even if they dont like doing it. so I have a letter to write soon to nikki. and pray for spring to come.
no one is allowed to call me teenie beanie here or anywhere btw it was her name for me and no one else can use that name only her.

How fortunate your friend was to have you. It would have been difficult for her family, as well as yourself, to watch her decline and not know any of you. The thought of her knowing this was to come was not how whe wanted to be remembered. The tears and heartbreak is for the women who wanted to be spared and to spare those she loved as well. Hopefully time will soon heal with the knowledge how much she loved all of you.

Gerry
ger715 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
Addy (02-04-2013), Alffe (01-25-2013), BlueMajo (02-04-2013), Brain patch (03-14-2013), Burntmarshmallow (01-25-2013), hippiechick (02-04-2013), Koala77 (01-25-2013), Lara (01-24-2013), Mark56 (01-24-2013)