i seem to be calming down ... i think? or maybe not so much and i'm getting used to this. i don't know. i also have a migraine which makes it so i suffer physical pain if i shout... eh, once, twice, and then the impulse control starts to kick in out of self preservation i guess? but only insofar as volume....

i got real mad at my father when he threw a silent tantrum and refused to come to dinner. all because he was interfering with mom's cooking - by touching raw poultry and wiping areas where it had been with a cloth that was not supposed to be "contaminated." he got scolded and thought it was funny. my mother got upset when he came around the second time and then he got all insulted. he was supposed to watch the bread and just ignored everything and sat and played computer games.

result. he din't come to dinner and let my spinach thingie get cold - which is good hot because i put a light romano cheese and breadcrumb topping on it, for very thin crunchy layer. after dinner he went and dumped all his food in bowls - indication to put away. he schlopped my spinach thingie in the bowl haphazard like it was pig slop. i had served it carefully, in nice squares to keep the topping together. i got furious and went back and ate his portion.

no i wasn't really hungry for it. but i made it with a freaking migraine and who knows how it will be tomorrow. unlikely for him to touch leftovers and it will not be the same way reheated in the microwave. i am not going to let him judge it based on a badly reheated version.

be was acting like a two year old. but for the first time i really mouthed off to my mom... called him serious bad words... i was so angry. so i think he is not the only one acting like a two year old here mostly in my case lack of countenance.

my mother said but he might have eaten it later (yeah, cold, and schlopped) my response was i don't give a ______. so even though i feel calmer i can maybe observe myself but i don't like what i see...

and i still have a stupid migraine - i took a pill too but it didn't work very well. i also burned my hands on the oven. treating with lavender oil but the worst spot is still hurting and i am getting lazy with applying the oil now...

grrrrrr. oh and mom didn't care for the potato thingie... didn't improve things. they have to be fed stuff they would make themselves. they are culturally bankrupt especially dad. mom at least likes chinese food but we can never have it because dad hates it. they like curry but have no concept of curry. they like one curry recipe, basically. i've made vegetable curries and dad says "where's the meat."

sorry i'm really irritated at him tonight. first he made fun of my mom's legitimate kitchen-hygiene observations, then he kept interfering - once he ranted at me about how he hates being interfered with and how he "doesnt' interfere" when other people do things YEARRRIGHT. he doesn't ask questions or criticize, he just comes and MESSES with your stuff, with actions, before you even know what is happening.

~ waves ~