I had a similar day yesterday. I went shopping with DD22 a couple of days ago. She needed to get new jeans and she really likes the fit and style of a.n.a. jeans at JCPenney as well as the price ($20 on sale). We looked at all sorts of things and had a great time together. Yesterday, I mourned the days of wearing pretty heels and normal shoes, the days when I could go in to the stores and not worry so much about the cost of items or size. I was a budget but it wasn't as tight as it is now. I mourned the days when I could shop at several different places in one day and not get so fatigued and worn out. By the time we were done with Penneys, my legs were done. I was a trooper though and went to Target with her but took the scooter.

I mourned the social interactions that we get when we are out working - spending the day with great people and learning and doing things with them all day. I mourned the feeling of a sense of accomplishment that comes at the end of a workday. While not all days were like that for me, most were and I really enjoyed working. It was hard to give it up but since I couldn't walk well at all and kept falling all over the place, it was a no brainer that I just couldn't work anymore in any capacity. Although, it was at that point that I started doing medical transcription from home but it is not the same as being out in the workforce.

I mourned friendships lost. Funny how when someone gets ill, people tend to back away from them. I have kept a few good and close friends and am thankful for them. They are my true friends. But, I still mourned the friendships and acquaintances that you have when you are out working.

I mourned the days when I could just hop out of bed like that girl on that commercial and get busy with my day. Taking a shower, doing my hair and make-up was a snap compared to now. I mourned not being able to just hop in my car and go where ever I wanted or needed to go without having to think things through. Driving was so easy just a few years ago (7 years to be exact).

It must have been something in the air yesterday Sally as these were a few of my thoughts from yesterday. The one thing that I did do was to keep telling myself to push forward as there is no other option and that ballet flats can be cute when paired with the right pants & shirts. I dried my tears on that one. j/k I really didn't cry over all of this, I just mourned.

I hope today is better for you, Sally.