Basically, PT Hellerworker and I had great progress jan-mid march. But late february my littlest asthma baby got cold number 3 of 4 really bad practically-in-the-hospital kind of colds this winter. and I didn't have time/strength/energy to keep up with my end of it. I am also not sure i didn't injur myself more during that stretch because at the end of cold number 3 i just knew i was done. PT and Hellerwork became more of a "keep me going" than a "help me make progress" thing. I fooled myself for a while there thinking we were making progress, but looking back I think it was all pretty cirular. I had a good talk last week with SuperJoyce and she pointed out a few things that cemented my own thoughts.

Also, looking back, it was about the time of cold number 3 that I made a decided shift to needing more pain meds. Part of that could have been the wearing off of the second botox injections. or, as i was hypothesizing, that I hurt myself providing all the extra attention that my daughter needed during that time.

Lastly, after feeling the relief in my arm at the left scalene block this past tuesday, I can understand why I (or anyone elses with TOS!!!) am having so much trouble making progress. I could just feel the tension melt out of my arm when the block went in. Something in the way the nerves are compressed makes me hold my arms in a certain tense way. I don't unsertand it, maybe it is a little like when you turn on the IF stimulator a little too high and your muscles all want to contract uncontrollably. Having felt it come and go was so eye opening. I just don't see how you can override that once it is there????

Conveniently, I had been evaluating surgeons since Early March just in case.... so I guess now I just know for sure in my heart that it is time to move on and get it done. Actually, I am looking really really forward to it.

I am about 90% sure of my course of action including surgeon/surgery type. However, I have two more test results I am waiting for from last weeks trip to be 100% sure.

As soon as I get those I will post how I came to choose a surgeon. Maybe I'll do it on a new thread...not sure yet.

I am really rambling. Time to go to bed.


Sweet dreams everyone.

Johanna