Im 14 months into this and am pretty much almost there in being better. i work constuction everyday, i workout, i drink caffeine all day basically all the stuff i had to stop im back to doing its good in that regards and its been like this for the last few months

i have 2 symptoms left with are visual disturbances and some fatigue but i fight through it in hopes they go away but im getting sad because im realizing as more time goes on they might now i mean cmon its been 14 damn months now just get better already

BUT the thing i noticed which isnt even PCS is the fact i still dont want to talk or see anyone i used to be close with. i never try to hang out with my friends anymore, never want to talk to my family and i basically dont want to see anyone anymore. all i really want to do is be in my own world now. why is this? i went from a guy who would talk to friends every day and go out every weekend to becoming a complete hermit crab. its like the fact that im not my oldself makes me not want people to see me in this state. the fact that im almost normal but still cant do the things i used to like going out all weekend and drinking is really bothering me. ive lost friends because of PCS and my family thinks im turning weird.

last year i missed a lot being home and just not feeling well. its like im scared of the life i missed and dont know what to do without it. im so used to being hurt now i dont know any other way. how do i break this cycle my life is getting depressing and not worthwile IMO