[Matt--I wanted to say this to you yesterday and im sorry im working on a project and got pulled away. I understand now that you shared you autuism with me and that science being your reality. What im trying to tell you from a science point of view --- is that the science world doesnt have alot of hardcore facts when it comes to depression. It has a ton of good theories which make sense and some are stronger then others. The reason for this-- its because its a complex disease!! Remember when we first talked and I gave you the cancer reference ---it hasnt changed. You can research this and you will find --no hardcore answer. I also understand your fear about losing your intelegence ---what does it mean ---????--- its the ablility to understand and apply knowledge. Depression can make the brain work not as effectivley sometimes--- but it will not make you dumb.!! I really would like to see you try to take this obsessive thought and work it on yourself on seeking out a good treatment plan with your doctors. Take what you have studied in all these theroies and try to map out your own self treatment. Have your blood work checked cortisol levels ,chemical levels, try every known treatment in helping yourself recover. You are very smart Matt!! I wouldnt be suprised to see you overcome this by doing your research on treatments for yourself--- but you def need to work with your Dr assistance.