Yes, KathyM, they might well change their minds but it's about having the choice to do so. I, personally, would not call their choice a selfish one because I don't like to be judged or to judge.
I loved what you said about "purple hearts"...age spots...
but each of us gets to define our lives and the quality of them....it's a "walk in my shoes" kind of thing, as you well know.