[QUOTE=featherbullet;97097

I'm writing out a list of things that will need to be looked after, once I'm gone. To make it easier for my family. I see that I bring them down ..and they feel helpless. My whole life has been pr

I don't have insurance or a cent in my pocket..I did try acupuncture when I was working..it did nothing either!.I try distraction but the pain always wins. I'm tired of being strong..this is not going away and I don't feel up to battling my way through every single moment of my life. I don't have kids or even a spouse..so I don't really have anyone to stick around for.

I'm happy to hear that some people have recovered..and I wish you all the same. :-)[/QUOTE]

Hi Feather,
I really feel the need to respond to your statement concerning writing a list for your family members and making it easier on them.
I am a family member of a person who committed suicide. I can promise you doing that will not make it easier for them then having you here.
My sister lived in pain due to severe Rheumatoid Arthritis. She also got addicted to drugs and alcohol trying to get away from that pain. She too thought the only way out was to leave this world. She apparently thought we all would be better off without her and her problems. We are not!!!! You see my sister took a part of my heart with her when she left. Please if you feel you don't want to keep going , it for your family. Suicide is never the answer. If only the people who do it could look into the future before they do and see what it does to their loved ones and friends. My mother will never recover from this. Basically, she is just waiting to die so she can join my sister.
Please trust me when I tell you that no matter how much trouble you think you cause your family, they would not want you to do this! Please get yourself some help!
Pick up the phone and call the hotline Boogirl sent to you. Your family will be so grateful that you did.
hopeful