don't give up. There are physicians that can and will help you. Also the YMCA has a scholarchip program for the people who can't afford it. It is free to go there, and they don't turn anyone away. Good way to make friends and try a swim. You are not a burden to your family. Keep coming back here for support. We will try to help on NT. All pain patients feels that way at times. It is important to have that good support team. I care about you. ginnie